Grief is a deeply personal and often overwhelming experience. When someone we care about is facing loss, it can be difficult to know what to say or do. We want to help, but we fear saying the wrong thing or making it worse. The truth is, support doesn’t need to come in grand gestures—it’s the simple, heartfelt acts of kindness that can make all the difference.

From listening with compassion to giving thoughtful keepsakes like ashes to glass jewellery, there are many ways to gently support a grieving friend or loved one. These personal gestures—especially something as meaningful as turning ashes into glass—can offer comfort in the darkest moments, creating a lasting connection to the one who has passed.

In this guide, we explore the best ways to be there for someone who’s grieving, offering understanding, reassurance, and emotional support through presence, empathy, and simple acts of care.

1. Listen Without Needing to Fix

One of the most powerful things you can offer someone who is grieving is your ability to truly listen. Grief is not a problem to be solved—it’s a process to be experienced. Avoid trying to cheer them up or “fix” their feelings. Instead, provide a safe space where they can talk openly and honestly about their pain, memories, or even their silence.

Use gentle prompts such as:

  • “I’m here if you want to talk, or just sit together.”
  • “What’s been the hardest part for you lately?”
  • “Would you like to share a memory?”

Being present and non-judgemental gives your loved one the freedom to grieve in their own way and in their own time.

2. Respect Their Unique Grieving Process

Everyone experiences grief differently. While some may feel the need to talk and cry, others might become withdrawn, preferring solitude or distraction. It’s essential to respect their pace and emotional rhythm.

Avoid comparing grief, such as saying, “I know how you feel,” or referencing your own experiences unless asked. Even if your intentions are good, each person’s loss is unique and deeply personal.

If they are not ready to accept help or talk, let them know you’re available when they are, and continue to gently check in from time to time.

3. Offer Practical Support

When someone is grieving, even everyday tasks can feel insurmountable. A powerful way to show support is by offering help with the practicalities of life. This can include:

  • Cooking meals or organising a meal rota with friends and family
  • Running errands or helping with school runs
  • Taking care of pets or housework
  • Offering to drive them to appointments or memorial services

Instead of saying “Let me know if you need anything” (which can feel overwhelming to the bereaved), offer specific suggestions:
“I’m popping to the shops, can I pick anything up for you?”
 “Would it help if I took the dog for a walk this week?”

These gestures ease the burden without expecting the grieving person to ask for help, which they may struggle to do.

4. Remember Important Dates

Grief doesn’t disappear after the funeral. Anniversaries, birthdays, and holidays can be especially painful reminders of loss. One of the most meaningful things you can do is remember these dates and reach out.

Mark key dates in your calendar and send a message, card, or call on those days. It doesn’t have to be lengthy—a simple “I’m thinking of you today” can bring comfort and show they’re not alone in remembering.

5. Give a Thoughtful, Personal Keepsake

Physical reminders of a loved one can provide great comfort during the grieving process. Memorial gifts such as candles, photo albums, or jewellery can help preserve cherished memories.

One increasingly popular and deeply moving option is turning a loved one’s ashes into something tangible. Ashes to glass memorials offer a beautiful and lasting tribute by fusing ashes into glass to create unique jewellery pieces or ornaments. These keepsakes can be personalised, allowing the grieving individual to carry a part of their loved one with them always.

Whether it’s a pendant, ring, or decorative glass heart, ashes into glass pieces serve as a symbol of ongoing connection and remembrance, offering solace in moments of sorrow.

Just be sure the idea of such a gift is welcomed—grief is highly individual, and not everyone will feel comfortable with memorial jewellery. Sensitivity is key.

6. Be There for the Long Haul

Often, support floods in during the first few weeks after a loss, only to taper off as time passes. But grief doesn’t have an expiry date. Months—or even years—later, your loved one may still be grappling with pain, loneliness, or a sense of being forgotten.

Continue to check in regularly. Invite them for coffee, ask how they’re doing, or simply share a funny story to brighten their day. Let them lead the conversation, but don’t avoid talking about their loved one if they want to. Saying their name and remembering them openly can be profoundly healing.

7. Encourage Self-Care Without Pressure

Grief can take a toll on mental, physical, and emotional health. While it’s important not to push someone too hard, gentle encouragement to take care of themselves can be helpful.

Suggest small, manageable acts of self-care:

  • Going for a walk in nature
  • Attending a yoga or meditation class
  • Keeping a journal
  • Joining a local support group

Offer to accompany them if they feel anxious about going alone. Don’t insist—but let them know they deserve care and rest, even in sorrow.

8. Avoid Common Missteps

Despite our best intentions, certain phrases or behaviours can unintentionally hurt. Avoid saying:

  • “They’re in a better place.”
  • “At least they lived a long life.”
  • “Everything happens for a reason.”
  • “Time heals all wounds.”

These platitudes can minimise the person’s pain or make them feel rushed to “move on.” It’s better to say:

  • “I’m so sorry for your loss.”
  • “This must be incredibly hard.”
  • “I’m here for you—whatever you need.”

Above all, be genuine and kind. You don’t need perfect words—just a warm, open heart.

9. Celebrate the Life, Not Just the Loss

Celebrate the Life

Grief often includes a desire to honour the life that was lived. Encourage your loved one to share stories, photos, or create memory boxes. Consider organising a remembrance event—something simple like planting a tree, lighting candles, or gathering to share favourite memories.

Creating moments of celebration amidst the sorrow can help your friend or relative move forward while keeping their loved one’s spirit close.

Final Thoughts

Grief is a journey with no set timetable, and your presence can be a guiding light for someone struggling to find their way. Whether through listening, helping with daily tasks, or offering a thoughtful keepsake like ashes into glass, your support can help them feel less alone.

You don’t need to have all the answers. What matters most is showing up with love, patience, and compassion.

Because when we show up for one another in times of sorrow, we help carry the weight of grief—one small gesture at a time.