The one parenting debate that always gets out of hand on is that working mums feel stay at home mums have it much easier than they do.
Let me just re-phase the stay at home mum I am referring too – the unemployed single mother mainly but I do see mothers who do have working partners being targeted the same way.
Some claim they are a better parent because they are a better role model to their child. Having a partner who works does not mean you cannot work too and all mothers should be in employment, providing financially for their family.
Of course, we have to be very careful as there are mothers who are unable to work and I am always quick to remind others of this. But the working mums are angry at those who refuse to work and instead choose to be a stay at home mother despite being more than capable of working.
Should mothers who are capable of working have a choice if they work or not?
I really dislike this debate as I can see both sides of the argument, but I firmly believe that no mother is better than another. We are all equal. There should be no divide.
WORKING MUMS VS. STAY-AT-HOME MUMS?
Working mothers will argue that they are personally providing for their children while stay at home mothers are relying on the tax payers money to raise their children. I can clearly see why working mums feel angry at this.
They have to go out to work and leave their child in the care of others just to put a roof over their heads and food in their child’s mouths. Is it any wonder they feel envious and frustrated at the single mother who lives next door, who does not work yet appears to be able to buy the best of everything and have holidays, when their wage barely covers the bills.
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Is it the single mothers’ fault she is financially better off not working?
When you are a stay at home mum, you can feel very isolated and alone and this is one of the hardest things I believe. With only a child to talk to day in day out, it can drive you to despair. There is only so much housework you can do in a day before you become bored.
But when you are a working mum you are out amongst people and are interacting with others. You have a great social life and also the chance to be yourself. You are not just a mother. This is one of the great benefits of being a working mum.
Are working mums happier than stay at home ones?
When you work, you are typically in a better financial position, stay at home mums normally find they have to rob Peter to pay Paul. Although each situation is unique and some mothers are better off not working and claiming benefits but is that their fault?
Working mums feel a sense of pride and accomplishment when they purchase things for their child because they worked hard to buy them. You also enjoy trips and holidays and fun experiences with them, such as outings because you work hard to provide your child with these memories. It is nice to feel you did this for your child.
Should unemployed stay at home mums not be able to create the same memories with their children?
Are we really saying the child should suffer because society says an unemployed mother cannot and should not be treating their child?
Working mums often feel guilty as they are not spending as much time with their child as they would like too. While a stay at home mum sometimes gets fed up that they spend far too much time trapped at home with a child to care for.
Making the decision to stay home with your kids or join the workforce can be a difficult process. There is no right answer. Dr. Phil encourages each woman to make the choice that brings her closest to fulfilling her hopes and dreams.
What are your own views?
Are working moms better role models than a stay at home moms?